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ICYMI I had the pleasure of writing a guest spot...

...for my friend, David Weiss' newsletter called Besides Code! It was enjoyable to be a little vulnerable. I hope you'll check out his newsletter if you're not already following it - he shares excellent tips, advice, and stories to help with growth, communication, and leadership skills. 😁

- Mindi Weik

Link to Original Post

I’m happy to share this guest post from my friend, Mindi Weik. She has a vulnerable story to share about burnout that we can all learn from.

Your mental health matters. And I’ll never stop saying that. I’ve learned this lesson the hard way in my career. I’ve suffered from burnout and high-stress levels more times than I can count.

In this post, Mindi shares three effective ways to foster mental wellness so you can stay focused on your goals and prevent burnout.

We’re human; we stumble.

Whether a resolution, intention, or goal, it can be hard to maintain momentum. You might grow exhausted or become derailed.

Whatever the case, start by reminding yourself that stumbling is OK. We’re here to talk about ways to pick yourself back up when that happens!

Shifting

Last year, I stumbled. More than once. Despite this, I tried to maintain multiple spinning plates. This led to severe burnout.

If you’re unfamiliar with “spinning plates,” it’s a balancing act, somewhat akin to juggling. Imagine someone holding a small wooden pole, precariously balancing a spinning plate. This feat takes work and attention, but it can be done.

Now imagine that person balancing another pole, another spinning plate. This is harder.

What if they held several poles and plates? More plates means the plates are more likely to fall or stop. We only have two hands!

Burned out, all of my plates suffered. Quality dipped, and it was perpetually harder to keep them spinning. You can probably see where this spiral leads.

When we notice that we’re not performing at our best we can:

• Drop certain plates

• Take a break

Drop certain plates

Dropping all the plates is the worst-case scenario. When you drop everything, you stop, and growth halts.

It’s possible to be forced here by unexpected circumstances. But, if we see the metaphorical train coming, we can jump off the track!

When we do nothing to address oncoming burnout, all the plates fall. They likely smash to pieces unsalvageable. We can catch ourselves and consider other options to avoid losing all of our plates.

The best way to do this is to pause and evaluate each plate. To be most effective, be honest with yourself.

• Do I need to do this right now? Is this a self-imposed pressure?

• What’s the worst that could happen if I drop this plate?

• What’s the best that could happen if I drop this plate?

• Am I spinning this plate for myself or someone else?

• What do I want to accomplish?

Compare the plates. Is our hands-on side project work the most important? Or is time better spent working to improve effectiveness at work?

The individual decision varies, but it’s important to examine thoroughly to identify if you spend your time where you desire or need to. Then you can drop plates that don’t help you progress or are okay to drop. Like a plastic plate that can easily be picked up later, maybe it’s reading a technical book or a personal project you can pause and resume in a few weeks or months.

Take a break

If you get anywhere close to burnout, it’s time for a break. Full stop.

This was difficult for me. I worked and learned during the day; during nights, weekends, and breaks in the workday I would:

• build and learn more things

• write Substack articles

• engage with my LinkedIn network

• organize, promote, and host women in tech events

• read informative books or articles

• work on conference or low-key talks

• …and handfuls of similar things plus balancing time with friends, family, and myself.

☝️ This is a list with too many plates.

To pinpoint what to drop, I paused everything for roughly 2-3 months. I found opportunities to step away from work, take a trip, enjoy a staycation, and find quiet space after my workday.

This space helped me think about what I wanted to accomplish and which plates might be plastic. I recharged, ending with a better sense of what was important for me moving forward.

Start Small

We shifted; we’re ready to regain motivation and resume growth! But how can we do that?

“Atomic Habits” is one of my favorite reads from last year. Much of its advice feels like common sense. However, that advice is often forgotten. We rarely enact this common sense.

The two concepts that helped me most:

1. The 4 laws of behavior change

2. Habit Stacking

The 4 laws of behavior change

Reflect on your goals, resolutions, or intentions and brainstorm ideas to make them slightly easier to accomplish. The more you break it down, the easier to start building momentum, however microscopic it may feel.

The 4 laws of behavior change are:

1. Cue: Make it obvious

2. Craving: Make it attractive

3. Response: Make it easy

4. Reward: Make it satisfying

Let’s use a common resolution to start an exercise habit to gain measurable strength or lose a certain amount of weight.

Cue: We might use an alarm or do this during lunch. Find a consistent way to make it obvious that it is time to head to the gym or outside for exercise!

Craving: We may feel energized to burn some energy. Perhaps if we exercise at lunch we feel a craving to blow off some steam.

Response: For a morning alarm, this might be prepping workout clothes near the bed. If we choose lunch and work remote, it may be easiest to step outside, put on a video, or have home equipment rather than heading to another location.

Reward: We are relaxed and enjoy the endorphins we released!

Even if we only make it to the gym at first, roll out a yoga mat, or put on some shoes, this is a small step in the right direction. Do a few minutes next, then a few more. Quickly your habit begins to form. Starting is the hardest part; don’t be too hard on yourself in the beginning and allow organic growth over time.

→ Bonus tip: Reverse the 4 laws of change to break a bad habit!

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Habit Stacking

This is one of my favorite concepts because it worked particularly well for me. Building on an existing habit makes a new habit stickier.

I struggled to be consistent falling asleep “on time” for a restful night and an energized morning. I hit snooze on repeat and groggily rushed through a chaotic morning to get to work.

Of course, I still miss the mark sometimes, but it was easier when I built upon my nightly ritual. Instead of brushing my teeth and looking at my phone until I eventually drifted off, I replaced my phone with a physical book.

It keeps me from unnecessary scrolling and promotes my reading habit. Brushing my teeth now triggers an urge to open a book. In turn, I make a little progress in the book and it helps me drift off more easily than my screen!

Give Yourself Grace

There will be bumps and stumbles. It’s normal! The best thing we can do is remain kind to ourselves to keep going when it’s tough.

Self-talk matters. Talk to yourself like you would a friend.

Affirmations and Positive Self-Talk

I’ll leave you with some helpful ideas. We can reframe our self-talk. I like to imagine I’m talking to someone else in my shoes. It helps me provide more genuine self-talk.

Here are some examples:

• We wouldn’t tell a good friend that they are foolish to start a new project or bad at a new hobby right after starting, right?

  • What we can say instead: “I am learning a new craft. I will get better with time.”

• We wouldn’t tell our good friend they are terrible because they made a simple mistake.

  • What we can say instead: “I am allowed to make mistakes, we all do! They are growth opportunities.”

• We also wouldn’t tell a friend that they’re not smart or capable enough to understand a problem.

  • What we can say instead: “I don’t have to know everything right away. I can break it down step by step.”

Thank you to Mindi Weik for sharing her story about overcoming burnout and three ways to prioritize your mental health. Please check out her newsletter, codeOutLoud, and follow her on LinkedIn.

Thanks so much for reading! ✨

Did I miss anything, or would you like to add anything?

Let me know!

I appreciate constructive feedback so we can all learn together. 🙌